Yoga & The Artist’s Way, week 9
In week 9, one of the tasks is to re-read the previously forbidden morning pages we’ve been writing every morning so far. At first it’s discouraged because we are so busy judging ourselves at the beginning of the process, the pages are pretty tough to take. After a while, we can look back through that stuff with a lot more compassion, and also see just how far we’ve come in 9 weeks.
Having done this book several times before, I had been feeling this time around that I’ve gone over the ground plenty of times, and the basics are nailed down. Lots of interesting changes are taking place in the big picture, but on a day-to-day basis, I’ve been telling myself there isn’t much more to discover from the “process.”
So here’s what I wrote on day 2 after bitterly complaining about how hard it is to write by hand again:
I can’t believe I chose a notebook with this many lines! A basic composition book has only 21 lines and this has 36!! Wow. That’s going to be an extra 45 lines per day! 5 pages instead of 3. Maybe I should do timed writing instead. Maybe I should change notebooks. Maybe I should stop writing whenever I feel like it. Maybe it should be approached like yoga - effortless effort might be the key. Slow the pen down a bit, soften the pressure of it on the page, release the tension in your arm and hand, just keep flowing through the words and allowing, allowing, allowing, without expectation, whatever the next word might be. Wait a second. 36 x 3 is 108. 108 sacred lines. Now I’m going to have to write all of them regardless. Sigh. Yesterday I claimed to know a LOT about morning pages, but here I am, a beginner again, not understanding any of it.
The pages tell the true story. Every time.
